Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Mass Romantics

No one loves you in winter? In the parlance of the nineteen-fifties, no one dates. We cross calendars, seek comments, lock in patterns, narrowcast to our narrow castes.

If you've never been worth the words, the glue and scissors, my time when you're not around — well, what hours are you counting down? You're on the lost list. I had to replace my little black book. I'll recreate that list, but I can't recapture the kissed. Time being, I've got one.

One, and we're talking mass romantics and Internet semantics. We're illicit but complicit, maybe a little horrific. Horrifically cute, though. Oh, you.

And then I don't like you at all. I feel as baited as ever and can't touch my thoughts. It's sending me on an existential trip until I can't remember why I went. You're breaking all the chemical bonds that tie us to ourselves. You're dropping oil in water and shaking and shaking. I can't bear being a macaroni noodle, but half of a whole. You've come by me and tried to combine me.

Last night, this morning, I want something like sound. I turn on the radio and women cry. There are cities dying like no one you've ever known to die. Is there a moment of peace before an explosion? Don't they deserve it? They, and their sons and daughters with them.

I can't know why this happens. I sympathize for everyone on all sides until I cry too. You don't know that this happens. They were sleeping, waiting for the power to come on so they could study for their exams. You're tracing dark loops through glaring commercial zones. You should be learning. You are dying.

Good morning Britain, because you run summer time and I stay up late in summertime, late into winter and late to the year. I'll tune to where it's already tomorrow. BBC, you're there and I'm not. I'm not through with this year. I'm not even really ready to hear. But when I touch the antenna you polarize all the static between my cells.

7 Comments:

Blogger indie said...

Gorgeous words, as usual! Glad to see that you're still on the phantasmal edge of bouncing electrons.

January 26, 2009 11:45 PM  
Blogger EllenHoff said...

I really like the part with the macaroni noodle.

February 08, 2009 8:42 AM  
Blogger Anna said...

(I must point out that the macaroni noodle was borrowed from a girl in my poetry class this summer.)

February 08, 2009 3:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi anna, I commented on one of your blogs a couple of years ago. You maybey dont remember me but you stayed with me in 2005 when you were on your tour of the UK. Please could i have your email address? I would like to get back in touch, find out what youve been up to these past few years! Hope to hear from you soon, Rachael xx

March 04, 2009 2:21 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

Rachael! What's your email address? I only have your old one.

March 05, 2009 11:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heyyy :)

Its rachyallen@hotmail.co.uk

xx

March 08, 2009 2:43 PM  
Blogger Spencer Gore said...

Well, too busy to post at college?

October 30, 2009 6:28 PM  

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