Saturday, November 05, 2005

I Want To Rip Your Clothes Off

I cannot wait until one can illegally download clothing.

It'll come, you know, someday. The music and movie idustries are just first because they're easy targets. Their products are the ones that fit into little binary boxes. Eventually objects will too. And then every manufacturer will be screwed. But, 'til then, my ultimate fantasy is to be able to rip the clothes off everyone.

You, G, in your Billabong hoodie. I wore that for a day, once. Sewn-in thumb holes. There is no better garmet than the sweatshirt. Elizabeth, you who sits next to me in EP, take off your jeans. They're the most pefectly beautiful shade of blue. Anybody in a swoopy boho skirt - I want to swirl like a cancan dancer. When the trend's over you can have it back. And you, Necker's sister, going through your pink-zippered Dickies purse. Punk, and functional, too. I may be incapable of talking to you, Fai, but gimme that!

I'm obsessed by fashion. I crash into people in the hallway, trying to twist back and get a second look at something going the other way that caught my eye. They're never just clothes. And I'm so critical. I thought Brittany said she could "find something cheap about everybody". It was actually "something cute" - but I could find something cheap about almost everybody. And I'll enjoy my time with you more if I can't spot a pair of those generic brown clogs or stupid square holes in your jeans. I try to be insightful, not superficial. Everybody who sees what you look like forms opinions about your personality.

And, like everything interesting, fashion changes. Fads lie, trick you into admiring something you don't like. Fads make it so difficult to be different. But fads make it so difficult to be different - to be unique, you really do have to be unique. And occasionally they're even good of themselves. Brown, orange, and tan should be the next fad colors. Not too radical a shift from blue and brown, but less cutesy, and both restrained and kicky. Bring in some yellow in time for spring, and maybe pleats to replace these little flounces. Next week, keep your eyes out for brown and orange together. I see more of it all the time.

Hey, all you girls who wore fabulous striped, heart-patterned, and polka-dot kneesocks on Mismatch Monday. Can't you dare wear them any old Monday? You don't deserve them. Hey, you, reader. Strip. Give me your clothes and then go away.

14 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anna, you're hilarious. I have a boho skirt you can borrow for a while if you really want to.
The Great Blue DOnkey

November 05, 2005 10:32 AM  
Anonymous Annie said...

*pulls off favorite Glo jeans, Old Navy underwear, comfy Gap grey tee, and Gap pink bra*

Wow. I need to buy stuff from non-mass-producing companies. Bleh. You made me disgusted with myself.

November 05, 2005 4:23 PM  
Anonymous Gina said...

well actually... im wearing other peoples clothes right now... shanes pants, kelsey's shirt, my own thong and bra, but you kno... lol.
i just go and steal clothes from ppl. i meanl ike, i borrow them and never really return til they realize that i still have it. shhh lol
im so weird

i hate those damn brown shoes, everyone buys 'em to be "in" or whateer, i think that they look like shit. ic ant wait til thats over

<3 gina

November 05, 2005 5:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anna, you seem really eager to have people strip down...

November 06, 2005 10:20 AM  
Anonymous Sophie said...

I'm not sure what interest you'd have in an old Highlands shirt, plaid fuzzy pants, and Korean underwear, but you can't have the latter. ^^

*sigh* I wish you all could shrink so I could properly steal your clothes...

November 06, 2005 10:41 AM  
Blogger The Great Blue Donkey said...

heh, sophie, I got a shirt you can steal cuz it wont fit anna properly i dont think. Nor did it EVER fit me.

November 06, 2005 11:25 AM  
Blogger indiejade said...

Don't care enough about fashion to be fashionably hip; shopping for clothes (in a mall) is akin to chewing off my cuticles. I do love thrift stores, though. ;)

November 07, 2005 6:55 PM  
Anonymous Swimmerette said...

haha you can borrow those shoes of mine, second thought come over and rade my closet whenever you feel like it just call me and give me 2 minutes warning

November 07, 2005 9:38 PM  
Anonymous gina said...

well... you totally stole my billabong hoodie today, does that count?!?!?!
of course.. you didnt steal it cuz i wasnt gonna wear it and you asked and i said yes... so technically i gave it to you.. so yeah... well anyway
lol im so lame
ooh guess waht
lover boy and i are going out now.
dont tell anyone!!!
i wanna keep this one on the dl just in case it doesnt stand my one week thing lol
-gina xoxo

November 08, 2005 6:22 PM  
Anonymous Lil' Bhudda (Keanau Reeves) said...

Gina, i know, and i m gonna tell everyone!!!
HAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!
DOn't hurt me.

November 08, 2005 9:09 PM  
Anonymous HouseMastrrr540 said...

Wow.
That was sooo hot (Was that good, ur royal highness?).
-Schatz

November 08, 2005 9:12 PM  
Blogger sarah said...

la la la..... i'm not sure how much interest there would be in my xhiliration red/white slightly see through shirt, soundgirl black pants, old converse high tops, and a hat that matches the butt pocket on my pants but whatever..

Oh, I would kill for someone with decent fashion sense that had a closet full of clothes that fit me that i could raid...

November 09, 2005 6:15 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

Converses, please!

November 09, 2005 8:04 PM  
Blogger sarah said...

oh please, everyone has them, they are very annoying now... they were the thing to have last year (real ones, not rip offs) them and those ugly burlap sack shoes called birkenstocks...

Now they are stupid, everyone has them and you are no longer orgianl, too bad, get over it, at lesat they're comfortable, right?

Of course as I type this I'm thinking about asking for knee-high, fold down to high-tops version of Converse, I haven't seen those on people feet yet. Those and leg warmers, please!

November 10, 2005 6:02 PM  

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